I call him Hissy

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As is my custom, this Friday post will be a hodgepodge of hijinks and whacky happenstances.

I’ll start with Dalton McGuinty, the now-former premier of Ontario: http://www2.macleans.ca/2012/10/19/a-centrist-party-that-has-lost-its-centre/

 Rumours are floating that he’ll make a bid for the leadership of the federal Liberals. Most of the so-called experts are dismissive of the idea, but I think they’re ignoring the nature of public life in 2012. We’ve become a very forgiving society. Or maybe we just have short attention spans. Dalton may be political deadweight today, but that says nothing about what he’ll be tomorrow. Redemption has become our favourite plot line.

I can’t stand McGuinty. There are lots of good reasons to dislike the man, many of them tied up in his right-down-the-line adherence to Big Brother Liberal orthodoxy (which made his vain attempt to finally stand up to unions so entertaining), but really I just hate the guy because he captained the team that banned my Staffordshire bull terrier (STB puppies seen here: http://www.staffordcanada.com/purchasing.html) as part of a province-wide pit bull ban (http://www.pets.ca/forum/archive/index.php/t-8563.html and http://www.pets.ca/forum/archive/index.php/t-36150.html). His Attorney General, Michael Bryant, used all his power to ban dogs at the same time outlaw motorcycle clubs experienced an unprecedented growth spurt in Ontario. Of course, maybe his mixed up priorities had something to do with his alcohol problem (later revealed in Bryant’s book detailing the time he killed someone with his car: http://www.theglobeandmail.com/commentary/columnists/michael-bryant-is-sorry-but-i-want-more/article4498142/).

Anyway, good riddance to bad rubbish. If we’re very, very lucky, McGuinty and his former Attorney General will never gain public office again.

Rally car racing is very cool. My dream hobby, really: http://www.wrc.com/ Too bad I don’t have a spare hundred grand kicking around to get started. We did own a tiny Mitsubishi when we lived overseas, though: http://autospeed.com.au/cms/title_Mighty-Minica-ZZ4/A_2705/article.html

It had a 0.6 litre engine and all-wheel drive. The Dangan – which means ‘bullet’ – was 14 years old, but in great condition and peppy for something the size of a ride-on mower. Mitsubishi, for those not up on the rally scene (like I am, being a world-renowned expert and all), is a prominent player in rally racing.

Lack of race money shouldn’t stop me completely, though. There’s always r/c racing - http://www.buzzfeed.com/jwherrman/greatest-rc-car-chase-ever-might-just-be-best-car - or slot cars: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHbXxV1PKic.

I got to test drive one of these (http://www.edmunds.com/lexus/is-350/) for a magazine review once. An interesting experience. Driving the slalom course with a professional driver giving you tips from the passenger seat was very cool. Seeing how many freebies car companies give to automotive journalists was eye-opening, though: “Can we fly you to the test site? Do you need a hotel? Here, have an iPod Shuffle so you can test the sound system.”

And finally, in random news, this heart-warming, bloodthirsty story: http://www.news9.com/story/19858704/12-year-old-girl-shoots-intruder-during-home-invasion

No one wants their child to go through this experience, and the merits of using guns for home defense (pretty much illegal in Canada) can be debated back and forth, but this situation had a happy ending: Girl safe, but now with the knowledge she’ll take action under terrible duress, and the intruder alive but with a bullet hole to remind him of his idiocy.

This story of silly government censorship: http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/nova-scotia/story/2012/10/19/ns-vanity-plate.html

I’m a staunch agnostic – don’t know, don’t believe anyone can know – but if this lady wants a Jesus plate, she should get a Jesus plate. I like the car, too.

Name a rattlesnake: http://northbrook.suntimes.com/news/15105547-781/name-the-snakes.html

Don’t drink and drive. You’re endangering your hamster. (http://mobile.oregonlive.com/advorg/db_/contentdetail.htm?contentguid=9zG43Ml4&full=true#display)

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